Understand and learn how to stop bullying and cyberbullying

The phenomenon of bullying is not new. It can take place in an office or school, and continue online. Dr Tan Hwee Sim, Specialist in Psychiatry & Consultant, Raffles Counselling Centre explains the differences, its effects and tips to manage bullies.

What is Bullying

• Physical aggression such as punching, hitting or rough pushing

• Verbal attacks such as spreading cruel rumours, making unfair or ridiculing comments

• Emotional bullying such as excluding one from group play or other activities, putting him/ her down in front of peers/ colleagues

What is Cyberbullying

• Flaming: Online “fighting” via electronic messages
• Harassment & Cyberstalking: Repeatedly sending malicious messages or threats

• Denigration: Distributing derogatory and untrue information about someone

• Outing and Trickery: Tricking someone into revealing secrets or embarrassing information

Negative Association of Bullying

Bullying has a negative impact on all parties involved. For the bullied, these devastating effects can last a lifetime. For the bully, they may also have underlying issues that need addressing.

The Bullied

• Change in behaviour or personality e.g. loss of interest in food or activities they used to enjoy
• Difficulty sleeping or has nightmares
• Feels sad, lonely and withdrawn
• Feels reluctant to go to school or work due to fear
• Sudden deterioration in school or work performance
• Develop, depression or anxiety, or suicidal thoughts

The Bully

• Likelihood of alcohol, drug abuse or criminal convictions
• Involve in fights and vandalism
• Feels disconnected from school or workplace
• Tend to be abusive towards their family or friends
• Morally disengaged. Lacked the necessary empathy to see the negative impact their own behaviour on others.

5 Tips to stop bullying:

• Adopt assertive body language such as standing tall or saying no in a firm voice
• Avoid unsupervised areas where bullying occurs and stay with friends or in a group
• Talk to a trusted adult or superior
• Avoid fighting back unless there’s no other options to protect yourself
• Leave the scene if you are at risk of getting hurt

6 Tips to stop cyberbullying:

• Don’t respond to rude messages
• Don’t share personal information or password with friends
• Keep a record of the evidence if you are bullied online
• Contact site provider if inappropriate material is being posted
• Block the bully and avoid opening unknown messages
• Seek help from someone you trust